00016: What Brews Under My Skin

For many people, the pandemic has become a polarizing issue where some people believe the virus is real while others believe it is fake. 

Within those that believe the pandemic is a real health threat, there are people who follow the rules and others who follow some of the rules according to self-convenience. 

My family is big. I have many siblings who also have children, and some of those children already have children of their own. So, my family is big. If you add the fact that we are an immigrant family from Mexico and that cultural and social practices are very different than American cultural and social practices, you may understand that while my entire family believes the virus is real, following the rules isn’t necessarily something everyone does as they should.

I have tried to stay away from my family as much as possible. I do this because I live about two hours away from them and because I know that my nieces and nephews, and even some of my brothers and sisters, bend the pandemic rules as they see fit. Do I agree with them? No. Do I argue with them about it? You bet. Do I get upset and want to poke their eyes out? Sometimes.

At the end, and after so much back and forth, I’ve decided that their doings and the results of those doings are their own decisions and consequences. The only thing that really irks me is that such decisions do involve my mamá and her two older sisters, all who are over the age of 80 and not in the best of health. 

One of my sisters, who lives in Mexico City, and I always talk about how we should just accept the reality of our family and prepare ourselves for the moment when things get ugly. By that we mean when the phone rings and we hear someone say, “So and so within the family has tested positive for COVID-19, and now they are in the hospital.” 

I follow the rules as they should be, but in reality, some members of my family follow the rules while others bend them to their convenience, and that fact, sooner or later will bring consequences that will affect all of us. 

This is exactly what brews under my skin. The emotional and frustrating inability to make family members understand the threat the virus present and to make them follow the rules as they should for the betterment of everyone around, but mainly for the safety of my mamá and her two older sisters. It’s like I’m doomed no matter what side of the argument I decide to be on. #carlosmanuelspeaksthetruth